Self-doubt, insecurity, uncertainty, all go hand in hand when one has relationship anxiety. Then again, it should not be surprising at all, because love is a strong emotion, and as such, it is bound to have a significant impact on our mental health. However, when it starts taking a toll on the relationship and physical health, it becomes worrisome.
People struggling with low self-esteem face more relationship anxiety than others. Moments of self-doubt and insecurities can thus ruin relationships and steal happiness. So how to deal with these confusing emotions and internal struggles, read on to find out.
Find what makes you anxious:
Identify the factor that is making you nervous about the relationship. If it is about past relationships, then mayhap identifying this factor can help you get past it. Moreover, identifying your attachment style can be beneficial for you. Attachment style is influenced by our upbringing and our connection with influential caretakers.
Thus if we had secure attachments in our past, then we are likely to be more confident and self-reliant, and vice versa. If you can identify your attachment style, you can make your relationship healthier and less anxiety-inducing. Furthermore, classifying your attachment style can make you more aware of why you feel anxious; sometimes it may be because of past relationships, and as such identifying it can help you move past it.
Make the internal dialogue more positive:
When you talk critically to yourself, it is basically a reflection of a negative influence from your past which you have internalized. It could be a caretaker with a poor attitude towards you, or a person of significance in your past, who did not think highly of you.
Either way, you have internalized this voice to the extent that you have a hostile internal dialogue with yourself. Naturally, this inner voice talks to you about your relationships as well and fills you with doubt and misgivings.
For a healthier relationship, it is important to recognize this inner voice and change the negative with the positive. This process is not an overnight one, and it is going to take time and great care. But gradually if the negative voice is replaced with a more confident and optimistic outlook, then it will reflect on your relationship as well.
Look for reassurance within yourself:
As mentioned before, people with low self-esteem are more likely to feel relationship anxiety. Self-doubt will only fuel the anxiety that you have, and you will look for reassurance towards your partner. It will start a vicious cycle in which you are dependent on someone else to feel secure. This attitude comes from within you, and you need to overcome this to find happiness in your relationship.
The real struggle is to find reassurance within us, rather than depending on someone else. By doing this, and accepting yourself, you will free your partner of a lot of baggage, and be able to focus on your relationship.
Sometimes seeking professional help is the best answer to overcoming anxiety, and improving the relationship. You can book an appointment with a top psychiatrist in Lahore, Karachi and Rawalpindi through oladoc.com, or call our helpline at 042-3890-0939 for assistance to find the RIGHT professional for your concerns.