If your social batteries drain quickly, you hurry home after a night out with friends, you have only a certain amount of charm for people, and you are discerningly social—then you might be what is known as an extroverted introvert.
Imagine if introverts and extroverts had their own Venn diagram, then the intersection would be what we refer to as ‘extroverted introverts’ or ‘introverted extroverts’. Unlike complete introverts, extroverted introverts have a mixture of traits with introversion being predominant. Some of these traits include:
Extroverted introverts don’t exactly avoid meeting people, but they like meeting new people and hearing their stories much more. However, their socializing capacity is extremely limited. They may go out once in a while to hang out with friends or even friends-of-friends, but they do not thrive on meeting new people. Too many outings or meetings can overwhelm or drain the extroverted introverts.
Reaching out only when recharged:
Extroverted introverts need some “alone time” for recharging. Once they are rested, they can go on out to be social, have parties and even organize events. Hosting is ideal for such people as it gives them a chance to spend time with their favorite people in their own environment– even if it is for a short while.
Taking time to warm up on social events:
Unlike pure undiluted extroverts who thrive in parties and social events, extroverted introverts take their time getting comfortable. The latter may seem reserved and withdrawn upon initial contact. However, once they are comfortable, they can even reach out to people and make new friends.
Small talk is not their forte:
Yes, they can make small talk, but do they want to? Most probably, no. True extroverts have no trouble making small talk with acquaintances, or even strangers. However, extroverted introverts have to struggle somewhat to make small talk especially with strangers. They would rather have an honest discussion about ideas, than a fake discussion about politics or weather.
Small social circle:
No true extrovert has a small social circle. An extroverted introvert, on the other hand, does not have the energy maintain a large social circle. Rather, they maintain the few relationships they have and make them count. To them the depth of their relationship is more important, since they don’t befriend just anybody. It is not that they have trouble forming new relations, rather they don’t have the inclination to maintain these relations.
Desperately need alone time:
Extroverted introvert may go out several times a week, that’s not an issue for them. However, they are pretty serious about their alone time. After a night or two out, they need to recharge by either being alone by themselves or a significant other.
Extroverted introverts need ample time between social engagements to revitalize themselves. Otherwise they feel exhausted, irritable or even depressed. They prefer running errands, cooking, cleaning, binge-watching their favorite show, reading, writing or just hanging in their house.
Quiet in a crowd:
Even though extroverted introverts love being in a crowd sometimes, they don’t always love being the center of attention of one. For this personality type, one-on-one conversations are more comfortable than talking in a crowd, especially group conversations.
If you feel you can relate to the above traits, you might be what is known as an introverted extrovert. The important thing to realise is that there is no wrong way to be an introvert. We can all be extroverted at some times and introverted at others. It’s all about understanding your needs and living the life you want.
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