Pregnancy can be extremely hard. The sheer toll it takes on the body, the pain endured, the life disrupted. However, that is just the tip of the iceberg. What follows it is just as difficult an experience.
Becoming a new mom can be really intimidating and really challenging every time, but it is especially daunting if you are a first-time mom. Everybody tells you how beautiful motherhood can actually be, but a few talk about the harsh realities of motherhood.
The first few weeks are especially hard. The body is the in process of healing, you have not yet properly learnt the needs of the baby. There are visits to doctors, looking after the house, taking care of own self.
Then there is the performance pressure; do you know everything about taking care of the infant, why is the baby crying, to breast feed or to bottle feed, when to feed. The list is endless. It is especially unnerving for women living without an aide, as they have to do everything themselves.
However, this is just a phase that can be made better with preparing yourself for it and making notes about how to battle it. Ignorance is not bliss when it comes to motherhood.
We have therefore compiled information about some things that you need to know especially if you are a first-time mom. Some tips for new moms are as follows:
1- Don’t Be Afraid to Ignore Advice:
When you are expecting, you will receive many instructions from your doctor, family, friends, colleagues, neighbors, almost everybody on a public transport and most of these advices will be really weird so don’t be afraid to ignore them.
For example, everybody will tell you to breastfeed no matter what, yes it is important, but let’s be real, sometimes it is not very convenient for whatever reason. Don’t beat yourself up about it.
People do not realize the sheer stress that pregnancy and birth causes. They pass off comments without realizing that this might make the mother feel less competent about herself. Hence, ignoring advices can be a good form of self-defense.
Also, older women have the habit of starting off conversations with ‘in their times’. Whilst some information is mostly useless and mythical, some might be useful. Ignore the former, take the latter. It’s your child and life, not theirs.
2- Pooping the First Time After You’ve Given Birth Terrifying:
Another uncomfortable talk that people seldom have is poop talk. You might not know this yet, but the pushing you do for pooping is basically what you do when you are giving birth. After you’ve delivered and especially if you had any tearing, it will feel like everything is going to rip out. It won’t though.
However, if there is any discomfort or pain, consult your gynecologist. One of the great tips for new moms is to take stool softeners to avoid the stitches from being affected but confirm from the doctor first. Have a candid conversation with your doctor.
Also, try having a healthy and active lifestyle after delivery. Those who have their babies via C-section should consult their doctor prior to taking up any strenuous activity.
3- You Can Worry About Your Body Weight Later:
Pregnancy and giving birth will change you, especially physically but you can worry about it later, with everything weighing down on you. Eat healthy, forget about the weight gain for a while and focus on your health, strength, and well-being; that’s what matters.
Forgoing healthy diet post-labor can actually hinder the body’s healing process. Also, most of the time, body itself, naturally, sheds off the excess weight. The rest can be catered to later, when you are all well and settled in the new life.
Moreover, women who are breast feeding should not even think about dieting. It will affect the milk supply and the baby will be deprived of essential nutrients. On the contrary, breast feeding helps with the weight loss.
4- You Might or Might Not Fall in Love at First Sight:
The parent-child bond is a relationship like all others. Some people look at their newborns and feel an instantaneous, overwhelming rush of adoration. Others take more time to fall in love with their babies. Both of these are fine, healthy, and absolutely normal. Don’t worry about it much and just focus on yourself and the wellbeing of your child.
One of the reasons for this lack of connection with the baby is post-partum depression. Unfortunately, no one really talks about it. It is okay to feel down, have blues, not have an endearing connection with the baby. Your hormones are all haywire at this point, and such behavior is expected.
Pressuring yourself and putting more stress on your mind will make the situation worse. You will get there, just give it time. If the stress is too much, contact your health care provider. There is no shame in seeking mental help at this point, rather, it is natural.
5- You Will Make Mistakes:
Even if you have read all the books on parenting in the world, you will still make mistakes. It’s important to learn and grow from your mistakes. Don’t beat yourself much about it. Don’t be too hard on yourself and focus on learning and improving.
It’s not a race; everyone has a different learning curve. You will get into the rhythm yourself. Just ignore anyone tsking around you. The negative energy should not put you down.
Becoming first-time parents is difficult for both the partners. It’s okay to put yourself and your baby first. Act on the instinct, trust me, you will know what to do. It will all be alright and you will be amazing parents. Following these tips for new moms can be helpful in navigating this unknown terrain.
If you have any concerns related to the well-being of your child, you can consult a pediatrician. You can book an appointment with a top Pediatrician in Karachi, Islamabad and Lahore through oladoc.com. You can also call our helpline at 042-3890-0939 for assistance to find the RIGHT Doctor for your health concerns.